Observance survey re mitzvot of Purim
I'm curious to know how others observe Purim. According to the Orthodox Union, these practices on Purim are mitzvot (commandments/obligatory observances):
Taanit Ester/Fast of Esther (day before Purim):
My understanding is that Taanit Ester is a dawn-to-sundown fast, though, interestingly enough, the OU's description, long as it is, fails to mention that major detail. :(
"On the 13th of Adar during Minchah, it is customary to give three halves of the coin which is the basis of the local currency. The money is given to the poor to do with it as they wish. This contribution is made in memory of the half-shekel given by Israel when the Beit Hamikdash [Holy Temple in Jerusalem] still stood; and whose forthcoming collection was announced on Rosh Chodesh Adar."
Purim:
"Purim has four main Mitzvot:
The Reading of the Megillah (Mikra Megillah)
The Festive Purim Meal (Seudat Purim)
Sending Gifts (Mishloach Manot)
Gifts to the poor (Matanot l'Evyonim)
Questions for my readers:
- Do you fast on Taanit Esther? If so, for how long? (My understanding is that some fast until after Minchah only, except on Yom Kippur, though I'm not acquainted with the halachic/Jewish law justification for that practice, and would appreciate being enlightened and/or corrected.)
- Do you give machatzit ha-shekel? If so, and if you're American (or Canadian?) do you knock themselves out getting almost-impossible-to-find half-dollar coins to give, or do you just give two quarters? (And why is it that some say we're supposed to give three half-of-the-local-currency coins when our ancestors gave only one half-shekel coin per person?)
- Do you attend a Megillah reading in a synagogue? If so, do you attend one reading or the traditional two readings?
- Do you attend or give a Seudat Purim/festive Purim meal? If so, is the meal held at your or another person's home, in a synagogue, in a kosher restaurant, in a place of employment or a kosher restaurant during lunch hour, or other (please describe)? Do you think that a Seudat Purim must include meat (nu, there's no such thing as a Jewish vegetarian?) and wine (setting such a bad and unsafe example for the kids if you really do get drunk enough not to be able to tell the difference between "Blessed is Mordechai" and "Cursed is Haman")?
- Do you give mishloach manot? If not, why not? For example, is it too inconvenient (because, say, many of the people to whom you wish to give mishloach manot don't live in your neighborhood) and/or too time-consuming (because you have to work on Purim [see my second comment here]), are you concerned about looking "too Jewish" and/or "holier than thou," are you concerned that the recipients may have absolutely no idea why you're going them goodies, or is there another reason (please describe)?
- Do you give matanot la-evyonim? If you give gifts to the poor for Purim specifically, do you make it a point to do this, or to arrange to have it done, on Purim Day itself?
- What "flavor" are you--Orthodox, Conservative, Reform, Reconstructionist, Renewal, non- or post-denominational, other?
30 Comments:
Let's see:
we always go to the evening megillah reading, and every year I think about waking up early for the morning reading and then don't do it.
I don't fast, though in recent years I've justified this on the grounds that I could be pregnant/am pregnant/am nursing. the spouse doesn't bother with the justifications.
no seudah
we send an extra check to the food bank
we bake hamentashchen, buy some cheap chocolate, let the toddler loose on some paper lunch bags with a crayon, put hamentashen, chocolate, and oranges into the paper bags, and call these our misloach manot. We give these out to friends we see at shul during the megillah reading.
Conservative.
I fast, attend both megillah readings, money to Mazon, standard mishloach manot (chocolate and hamentashen). Seudah is typically a bagel and mishloach manot candy (wash and bentsch), milchig.
I don't do the denomination thing. :)
Purim sameach!
And I never drink either.
I fast, go to both megillah readings, go to a seudah, send mishloach manot, give matanot l'evyonim, although I don't sweat about half shekel coins. Regarding drinking, I follow the opinion which says that to fulfill "ad lo yada" it's sufficient to have an extra glass of wine and go to sleep, since you can't tell the difference between Mordechai and Haman in your sleep.
Conservative
"we . . . let the toddler loose on some paper lunch bags with a crayon . . . "
:)
" . . . money to Mazon . . . " An excellent idea, and thanks for the reminder.
" . . . I don't sweat about half shekel coins." My local rabbi was quite adamant, in his "laws of Purim" sermon on Shabbat, that an American Jew does not fulfill the mitzvah of machatzit ha-shekel unless he or she gives a half-dollar coin. I was hoping to get a roll of half-dollar coins to share with the congregation, but, after going to four different banks, I was able to get only six half-dollar coins. It's nice to hear a rabbi chiming in with a more reasonable opinion. I do prefer to save the obsessive-compulsive element of Judaism for Pesach/Passover.
Here are my responses, with a few extra tidbits thrown in:
Fasting on Taanis Esther: Yes, all of us, since all the kids are over Bar/Bas Mitzvah. This year was different/easier in that since the fast started so late (dawn was 6:07 am in our town) due to the clock change, we were able to get up early and eat breakfast before it started. That helps, somewhat. But of course the fast will end later too!
Megillah: Yes, both night and morning. Though I have difficulty finding a megillah reading I really enjoy - nobody can do it like my dad did! I prefer it very accurate, very clear, and especially, very straight/no-nonsense. I especially despise readings when they goof around, e.g. using funny voices. By me, everything else on Purim can be silly, but not the megillah reading.
Mishloach Manos: We prepare packages of goodies - fruit, candy, sodas, chips, hamentaschen etc. - packed inside inexpensive Purim-themed gift bags or boxes (this year we picked up a bunch of them at Amazing Savings for 79 cents each)! We generally give out Mishloach Manos to a couple dozen or so local friends/neighbors, Purim morning after shul/breakfast. The kids and I drive around the neighborhood delivering. Also, we make sure that each kid gives to a couple of their friends personally, so each can fulfill the mitzvah.
Seudah: You already answered for me, in your post last year. :-} Once again, it was great having you guys!
Matanos L'evyonim: I give this on Purim night. There's generally one or two plates/boxes up on the bimah for people to place their cash/checks designated for Matanos L'evyonim, with the assurance that the money will be distributed to needy local families on Purim day.
Machzis Hashekel: Ditto - there's a separate plate/box on the bimah specifically for this donation. The way it works is as follows: There is a set of three half-dollar coins in the plate, usually taped together to keep them from getting mixed in the rest of the money. You're supposed to put in your own cash, some amount >= $1.50, then remove those three half dollar coins, then "redonate" them to the plate. That way, you are using coins representing 1/2 of the basic monetary unit of the country, analogous to the 1/2 shekel of biblical times. Why the custom is to use three such instead of just one, I actually don't know!
On a related note, there are varying customs as to whether Machzis Hashekel today is given by all males over bar mitzvah, or specifically by males 20 and over, as was the case for the real, obligatory Machzis Hashekel donation when the Bais Hamikdash [Temple] stood, which this commemorates. My own custom is the latter. I look forward to next year, when God willing, Ben will be able to fulfill this mitzvah for the first time - as Aaron never got to do.
Did I miss anything?
a little charity, a little wine, some gifts if I remember, the reading (once) at a small gathering with the rabbi, & occasional attempts at recruiting for my harem (so far, unsuccessful)...remember, this was a sexual contest that the Jewish babe won!
Do you fast on Taanit Esther? The whole day; dawn to nightfall
Do you give machatzit ha-shekel?
Yes, and you don't have to "knock yourself out" to find the half dollar pieces. They are provided in shul. You just make change form the collection plate, then toss that half dollars back in.
Do you attend a Megillah reading in a synagogue? If so, do you attend one reading or the traditional two readings?
Both readings
Do you attend or give a Seudat Purim/festive Purim meal?
Of course. At a home. I don't go to towk on purim.
Do you give mishloach manot?
Of course
Do you give matanot la-evyonim?
Of course.
The Reading of the Megillah (Mikra Megillah)
KRIAS HAMEGILLAH
* Do you fast on Taanit Esther? If so, for how long?
Yes. I fast all day, but don't wait until after the megillah reading -- I break the fast according to the earliest opinion (after sundown), earlier than I would for other fasts, since I have led Purim ma'ariv 9 years in a row, and I feel justified by the fact that it's a serious question for the rishonim whether it's even *permitted* to fast on Erev Purim (they all uphold the minhag of fasting in the end, but have to go through convoluted reasoning to get there).
(My understanding is that some fast until after Minchah only, except on Yom Kippur, though I'm not acquainted with the halachic/Jewish law justification for that practice, and would appreciate being enlightened and/or corrected.)
I haven't heard of this for Ta'anit Esther; you may be thinking of a Masorti teshuva that said this about Tisha B'Av.
* Do you give machatzit ha-shekel?
I pay taxes, and try to send in my return on or around Rosh Chodesh Adar.
* Do you attend a Megillah reading in a synagogue? If so, do you attend one reading or the traditional two readings?
I attend a megillah reading, but not in a synagogue. I always go in the evening. I try to go during the day, but the timing is difficult when Purim falls during the week (rather than Sunday or Good Friday), since I'm a teacher and the egal megillah readings in my neighborhood don't start late enough for me to get to work on time. I wish there were more (non-Chabad) late-afternoon readings.
* Do you attend or give a Seudat Purim/festive Purim meal?
Also totally depends on the timing of Purim. If it's on a weekday, not likely.
Do you think that a Seudat Purim must include meat
No.
and wine
No. I follow Rabbeinu Ephraim.
* Do you give mishloach manot?
Yes. (I generally just give them out at megillah reading or whatever I'm at.)
* Do you give matanot la-evyonim? If you give gifts to the poor for Purim specifically, do you make it a point to do this, or to arrange to have it done, on Purim Day itself?
I donate to Mazon on Purim Day.
* What "flavor" are you--Orthodox, Conservative, Reform, Reconstructionist, Renewal, non- or post-denominational, other?
Reform expat living in nondenominational communities.
Purim is my least favorite holiday. However in terms of observance~
--I usually stay home, make hamentaschen, and re-read the story. I try to write something on it.
--Alcohol gives me terrible migraines, so no drinking for me.
--I hadn't given charity on Purim specifically before, but I may start. Usually I save my big donations for Yom Kippur and Pesach.
oh..flavor=middle of the road Conservative.
After dancing my feet off in the back of the room at the Chabad of Midtown's Seudat Purim, I'm happy but exhausted. I'll comment further tomorrow night, if I can say anything coherent after *my first day back at work since breaking both wrists on Dec. 11 (!).*
Do you fast on Taanit Esther? If so, for how long?
Yes. Sundown to approximately end of civil twilight (which ends up being until after megillah reading because of maariv times.)
* Do you give machatzit ha-shekel?
If given the opportunity to do so. Generally, the way the practice works, where it's done around here, is that the shul provides the 3 half-dollar coins, which each person picks up and "acquires ownership of", and essentially exchanges the shul's $1.50 for $1.50 in other denominations, then returns the coins to the shul.
Not always given the opportunity, if not, I won't go out of my way to do the 3 coins thing aside from other tzedaka.
* Do you attend a Megillah reading in a synagogue? If so, do you attend one reading or the traditional two readings?
Yes, two readings.
* Do you attend or give a Seudat Purim/festive Purim meal?
Yes
If so, is the meal held at your or another person's home, in a synagogue, in a kosher restaurant,
My home.
Do you think that a Seudat Purim must include meat (nu, there's no such thing as a Jewish vegetarian?)
No. Ours is dairy.
and wine (setting such a bad and unsafe example for the kids if you really do get drunk enough not to be able to tell the difference between "Blessed is Mordechai" and "Cursed is Haman")?
I think people should drink responsibly. We drink/provide alcohol as part of our seudah.
* Do you give mishloach manot?
Yes, although they tend to be minimal.
* Do you give matanot la-evyonim?
Yes, a local charity (Yad Chessed) has a matanot la-evyonim program set up. All the local area shuls send money collected on Purim to their program, which provides food to area poor Jews on Purim.
* What "flavor" are you--Orthodox, Conservative, Reform, Reconstructionist, Renewal, non- or post-denominational, other?
observant/egalitarian, Conservaprax(?).
Do you think that a Seudat Purim must include meat
No.
Oh, and therefore my hamantashen are the best, because I use butter!
1) Observe Taanit Esther from dawn to full dark (and a little later since we go immediately into the Megillah reading)
2) My shteibel has a paper plate on which to give the half shekel, and another to leave donations for Purim food gifts for the poor. This year I went across the street to the bank during lunch (after all, I was fasting) and picked up 3 half dollars. (They were not silver coins.) I donated them first and the rest of the congregation then would 'buy' them and re-donate. I also gave a token amount there for gifts to the poor.
3) Attend both morning and evening readings and accompanying services. Note I almost never make an ordinary weekday Shacharit or Maariv.
3) I attended a Purim Seudah at the home of the (non-pulpit) rav who teaches a class I take. The host cooked a Turkey (because the Persian Empire stretched from Hodu to Kush), but I would happily have eaten a fancy dairy meal instead. I don't drink, but wine was available to those who wished. No one got drunk, and I'm not sure that anyone who drank wine actually drove at all, but I didn't know everyone there.
4) We did about half a dozen mishloach manot, along with the 'everyone gives everyone gets' box that the shul gives to everyone who joins in. We don't do themes. Each bag was personalized for the recipient. I delivered them all myself since we have no kids to act as messengers.
5) My wife was supposed to donate to a local kosher food bank for gifts for Purim - for some reason she specified the check was for passover instead, so I don't think that counts. :>) We give food gifts to that food bank every month and we did so a week before Purim, but we did not make other than a token donation to our shul specifically for Purim.
I am traditionally observant and live in an Orthodox community. I take off for Purim whenever I can because it is so much fun to watch the kids in costume going from door to door giving gifts of food. So much better chinuch than Halloween!
Since you focused on the traditional aspects of the holiday, let me ask about the non-traditional aspects on my blog.
Thanks so much for your responses to my survey! Here are a few of my own:
Eliyahu makes "occasional attempts at recruiting for my harem (so far, unsuccessful)...remember, this was a sexual contest that the Jewish babe won!" That's certainly one of the more daring Purim acts that I've heard about. :)
Anon. Mon Mar 09, 05:05:00 PM 2009, maybe this is because I've never gone to an evening Megillah reading in an Orthodox shul, but I'm 60 years old and I've never before seen a synagogue provide half-dollar coins for machatzit ha-shekel. More on that later.
Anon. Mon Mar 09, 05:06:00 PM 2009, I agree that Kriat HaMegillah sounds a bit more grammatically correct as the way to say Megillah/scroll reading in Hebrew. I think the OU may have gone for Mikra Megillah because that's the way the 1st brachah/blessing is worded. I wonder whether that's Aramaic-influenced rabbinic Hebrew.
BZ & Larry, thanks for the links to interesting reading.
Scarlettscion, I can't drink either, but I probably look drunk anyway, with all my dancing in the back of the room. :)
Anon. Tue Mar 10, 10:33:00 PM 2009, "observant/egalitarian, Conservaprax(?)"? Hey, maybe that's what I am! Okay, maybe I'm semi-observant, what with the riding to shul on Shabbos, but really, how else would describe someone who's not sure she believes in either G-d or halachah, but who davvens 3x/day & complains that her shul's not kosher enough?
Elie, stay tuned.
Okay, it's my turn to answer my own questions:
Taanit Ester/Fast of Ester:
I fast from before sunrise to after the Megillah reading; my husband observes only the Yom Kippur fast. To be fair, though, not to mention honest, I didn't start observing the sunrise-to-sunset "half" fasts until I began working for my current employer, a non-profit organization under Orthodox auspices. A little peer pressure goes a long way. (Blogging works that way, too: I didn't start davvening 3 times a day until I started to get embarrassed about not being able to give my Orthodox readers any acceptable justification for the fact that I *wasn't* davvening 3 times a day.)
Machatzit ha-shekel: Stay tuned--I'm saving the best for last.
Megillah readings: We go to both our shul's evening and morning readings--we don't have much choice, since we volunteered to lein/chant parts of the Megillah many years ago. :) My husband leins chapter 5, and I lein chap. 7. Yes, our rabbi has told us that the entire Megillat Ester is supposed to be read by one person, but I don't know that even my husband, a far more experienced leiner than I, is capable of leining anything that long, and certainly not in the middle of tax season!
Seudat Purim: Our scheduled guest had to bow out for health reasons, so we ended up at Chabad of Midtown. It was mobbed, and not nearly as heimish as Elie and Debbie's last year, but at least they had a live band as consolation.
Mishloach manot: Sigh. As I said in one of the posts to which I linked, I decided that it's just as well not to give out so many packages, knowing that we'll get next to nothing in return. Sure enough, we received the usual 4 packages of mishloach from the usual kind souls. I don't think we've ever received more than 6.
Matanot la-evyonim/gifts to the poor: We gave a little at shul and made a donation to Mazon.
Acharon, acharon chaviv (not sure of the exact translation, but it seems to mean something like "the last is dearest")--machatzit ha-shekel:
Rav todot, many thanks (or, as they say these days, a huge shout-out) to Elie, for teaching me, in his comment, how to enable my entire congregation to donate machatzit ha-shekel in the traditional manner!!! We don't do the three half-shekel version, we do the one half-shekel version, Torah Sheh-Bichtav/Written Torah style, but it works pretty much the same way, except that we need only one half-dollar coin.
Ever since he first witnessed our congregation contributing machatzit ha-shekel, our rabbi has been complaining--rather condescendingly, I've always felt--that we don't do it the right way. Yet, in all the years that he's been our rabbi, he never once showed us how to do it the only way that he considers right--rather challenging, given the difficulty of finding half-dollar coins these days--until yours truly walked up to the bimah and placed a half-dollar coin right in front of him on the lectern. (Final score: Congregant--1; Rabbi--0.) I've already put my husband, whose schedule is more flexible than mine (even during tax season) on notice that he gets the honor of scouring the local banks for half-dollar coins next year.
I do prefer to save the obsessive-compulsive element of Judaism for Pesach/Passover.
LOL
- Reconstructionist
- No fast
- Yes extra tzedakah, but we just empty out the tzedakah jar. A half-dollar is just lame. What can you even buy for 50 cents these days?
- yes we WOULD do the megillah reading, but it's after the Toddler's bedtime. We had to leave partway through the spiel, too. (Our community doesn't do daytime megillah)
- Yes mishloach manot, usually hamantaschen and whatever else I find laying around the kitchen thrown in a spring-looking basket I find on sale. Yes, technically these are usually Easter baskets. I avoid any that have bunnies or chickens on them. :)
- no festive meal, although we do eat lots and lots of hamantaschen for days before and on Purim itself, if that counts.
- I had a glass of wine before bed, after the toddler was safely sound asleep.
" . . . we do eat lots and lots of hamantaschen for days before and on Purim itself, if that counts."
:)
I fast until right before Megillah reading (I have about 10 minutes to eat something quickly before going up to shul).
I hear both readings of the Megillah. We give mishloach manot - some "real" and some using the yishuv "list" (everyone pays a certain amount for each familiy put on the list, a small amount goes to pay for the package itself and the rest goes to tzedakah). We have a Seudah together with a few other families.
In terms of Matanot l'Evyonim - our yishuv collects money ahead of the day, and purchases a small mishloach manot and some grocery coupons (fake "bills" which can be used at most major supermarket chains in Israel) and groups of adults and children travel to the city closest to us and knock on doors of families (names and addresses provided by the social services agency ahead of time)and give them the package and coupons. Most families are pleasantly surprised to have adults and children dressed up in Purim costumes come to their door with smiles and gifts!
Orthodox and living in a small yishuv in Israel.
fast- yes, actually got up and ate a little before dawn. fasted until after the megilla.
purim night- megilla reading at shul with wife and cleopatra, the mad hatter, and darth vader(my three kids dressed up)
I used the 3 half dollars in shul to do the machatzit hashekel and also give matanot l'evyonim. We also gave a lot to the ark(the local Jewish charity/food kitchen)
purim day- shul and megilla reading in the morning with cleopatra, derek rose, and daughter without costume. then spent a few hours delivering mishloach manot.(we also sent a bunch of cards... a donation has been made to ... in lieu of mishloach manot etc....)
purim afternoon- seuda with family and friends. the issue of meat is complex, but the bottom line for me is that the food should have some importance, and in this day and age fish can have the same importance- which is why I made grilled salmon on a plank, so we could have yummy milchik hamentashen for dessert.
I hope everyone had a great purim.
Noam
"Most families are pleasantly surprised to have adults and children dressed up in Purim costumes come to their door with smiles and gifts!" What a delightful idea, WestBankMama. Unfortunately, in New York City, we'd be afraid to open the door to people we don't know. Sigh.
Noam, long time no see! It's good to hear from you! (For the record, I'm sorry you ran out of time to blog.) So, nu, how'd you end up with a derek rose in the morning when you didn't have one in the evening--did one of the kids change costumes?
Could you explain why some folks give 3 half-dollar coins when the Torah itself mentions only one half-shekel?
Grilled salmon on a plank and dairy hamantaschen?! Too bad we can't leave NY for a few days in the middle of the hubster's tax season, or we would definitely crash your Seudat Purim! :)
darth vader turned into derek rose(and then, for shushan purim, went to school as kevin garnett). I guess it is good to have varied interests. :-)
Noam
Darth Vader (and/or his/her parents) must be a very creative person, to be able to whip up 3 different costumes in the space of roughly 24 hours. :)
1. fasting- dawn to nightfall
2. Megillah- twice
3. Seudah- some years, depending on whether I am at home or with relatives, where I'm invited/not invited, etc.
4. Misloach Manos- this year gave about ten, plus paid for a few dozen through shul (though this doesn't count halachically, its really just a way to be nice to various people and give to NCSY at same time)
5. Mach. hashekel- sometimes if I have the opportunity
6. Charity- yes but in different ways in different years. This year I just gave through the internet, last year a rabbi-designated charity.
7. Alchohol- always more than usual, but depends on what my body can tolerate.
Denomination- Conservadox. Probably same as you except I'm strict re shabbos
"Alchohol- always more than usual, but depends on what my body can tolerate." Woodrow, considering how poorly I tolerate alcohol, anything more than a sip is more than usual for me.
"Denomination- Conservadox. Probably same as you except I'm strict re shabbos." I may get there someday. Who knows? I'm more observant now than when I started blogging--a little peer pressure goes a long way, as I said in a previous comment. To be blunt, one of the main determining factors in my future Shabbat and Yom Tov observance may be whether or not we end up staying in our current neighborhood. At this point, I'm not sure that even switching to an Orthodox synagogue would help, since the local Ortho shuls are dying just as quickly as our current Conservative one.
Hey, everyone (assuming that anyone's still reading this post), it's that feast-followed-by-famine-followed-by-feast time of year. Enjoy eating up the leftover mishloach manot, hamantaschen, and practically everything else in sight, then survive the cleaning, and, now that Rosh Chodesh Nissan will be here at sundown tonight, have a Pesach Kasher v'Sameach, a Kosher and Happy Passover.
Enjoy eating up the leftover mishloach manot
Everything we give for mishloach manot is kosher l'pesach. We're the only people I know of with this custom.
Larry, that sounds like a really sensible idea, but it has one major drawback--it deprives everyone of an excuse to make pigs of themselves for a while. :)
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